So you hate Facebook? Thanks for sharing that with me...on Facebook.
'I can always relate to tampon commercials'...said no girl ever.
You're lesbian? You're not attracted to men...but you're dating girls that looks like men. That makes complete sense!
Teacher: 'Why didn't you do your homework?' Student; 'Sorry, but Kanye West didn't let me finish...'
Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interupt the start of yours?
I hate it when skinny people say they ain't skinny enough.
When you said you loved me, did you forget to say just kidding?
I love you is 8 letters...so is bullshit.
Another day at work...I'm having as much fun as a colorblind person playing twister.
Fighting the urge to put a sarcastic comment on someone else's status.
